Fitness makes you...

1 Better at sex

Let’s face it - one of the main reasons for getting a better body is to attract women with great bodies. Like this one here. And once you’ve attracted them, your fitness will help you keep them, because getting in shape will make you perform better between the sheets. This is the verdict of overworked researchers at the University of Arkansas.

The reasons? Exercise increases physical endurance, of course, but it also improves blood flow around the body. Anyone with even a basic grasp of biology knows what this means. Even better, the research showed that working out has a positive effect on libido – and it has a bigger effect on men’s than it does on women’s. So just be careful you don’t wear her out.

2 Stronger

No shit! But before you laugh us out of the room and into the wheelie bin, we’re not simply talking about the ability to lift more weight. Fitness makes you stronger at everything – and that’s sort of the point. ‘Training is about functionality,’ says MF fitness expert Jason Anderson. ‘It helps you go about your daily business, whether you’re walking, sitting down, standing up or lifting things – moving, basically.’

So it can make life easier – brilliant! – but there are also long-term benefits. Exercise can also help strengthen bones and guard against osteoporosis, the ailment that makes many elderly people vulnerable to falling and breaking things, such as their hips. Plus, inactive adults lose around half a pound of muscle per year. Serves them right, too.

Think of it this way - if being stronger makes it easier to pick up that lady on the sun lounger and carry her back to your beach hut (remember to ask her first), you’ll have even more energy for later.

3 Beat the sniffles

Exercise can help fight flu, say the boffins at the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Centre in the USA. In a year-long study of two groups of women who were told to either exercise or do some stretching, the stretchers suffered three times as many cold and flu infections as the exercisers. See? We can learn useful stuff from women after all.

So exercise can stop the sniffles, but only if you don’t do too much, too often. Intense exercise (more than 90 minutes at a time or running in excess of 30 miles a week) can weaken the immune system, according to the International Society of Exercise and Immunology. So go for short, intense sessions, steer clear of sneezing people after your workout and rest for at least one day between workouts to give your body time to recover.

4 Cleverer

Exercise increases blood flow to the brain, which increases oxygen and nutrient delivery. There is also evidence that, as you get older, aerobic exercise is better for your brain than doing crossword puzzles. Research at the University of Illinois found that among lifetime exercisers there was ‘substantial sparing’ from natural decay of the parts of the brain that handle memory, problem solving and, helpfully, thinking.

Even better, you can help preserve your grey matter even if you come to exercise later in life. A separate study at the Salk Institute For Biological Studies in San Diego backed up these findings, revealing that regular exercise can protect against Parkinson’s disease and even help people who have suffered brain injuries. Any exercise, it seems, is better than none at all.

5 Live longer

There’s no arguing about this one. People who have a ‘moderate to high’ level of physical activity live up to 3.7 years longer than those who take little exercise, according to a 40-year research programme by the Erasmus University Medical Centre in Rotterdam.

And there’s good news for us chaps. Research at Liverpool John Moores University found that women live an average of five years longer than men because their hearts are stronger – but men can close the gap by exercising. Women’s hearts beat as strongly at the age of 70 as they do at 20, whereas men suffer a 25 per cent drop. Regular exercise can strengthen the heart, to the point where in tests athletes aged 50-70 had hearts as strong as lazy 20-year-old men. If you’re one of those idle 20-year-olds, beware - men who are in the best cardiovascular shape between the ages of 18 and 30 are less likely to suffer heart disease in middle age, according to research by Northwestern University in Chicago.

6 Live healthier

There would be little point living those extra years if you spent them dribbling into a cup in an old people’s home. The best thing about this research is that it reveals you may well enjoy your dotage as a virile, reasonably coherent senior.

‘Physical activity does make a difference,’ says Oscar Franco, who led the Erasmus research. ‘Not only for how long you live, but for how long you live a healthy life.’ A University of Illinois study found the same, thanks to the psychological benefits of exercise. ‘Physical activity has long-term effects on quality of life and self-esteem,’ says study leader Edward McAuley. So what if you’re 70? You could still chase after a lady, Benny Hill style, along the beach. And you get a free bus ride back to the hotel.

7 Less stressed

Your bosses will be pleased to know that working out makes you a happier, more productive employee. Not that this will encourage them to install an office gym in your basement, of course.

Busy professionals who exercise during the day feel more productive, say researchers at Leeds Metropolitan University. Sixty per cent of workers in a study said their time management, mental performance and ability to meet deadlines improved when they exercised. The research revealed their productivity improved by 15 per cent on those days. So next time the veins on your boss’s forehead pop out when you dare to pick up your gym bag at lunch, show him this. Then get to the gym and pretend the punch bag is him.

8 More energetic

‘It’s the paradox of exercise,’ says Jim McKenna, professor of physical activity and health at Leeds Metropolitan University. ‘To get energy you have to expend some.’

So if you feel a little tired just after a lunchtime workout, this is a temporary energy dip. Take on the right nutrition (we’re not thinking energy nachos here) to replenish your carbohydrate and protein levels and you’ll be fired up for the afternoon. The Leeds researchers found workers who exercised at lunchtime were less likely to suffer afternoon fatigue, so now there’s no excuse for slacking. Maybe don’t show this bit to your boss, eh?

9 Happier

It may not feel like it when you’re struggling to squeeze out that last bench press, but exercise really does make you more cheerful. The euphoria that follows exercise, known as the ‘runner’s high’, was discovered by Kenneth Cooper of the Cooper Institute. He cited the case of a man ‘who was so despondent he wanted to die. Because his heart was weak, he thought the best way to commit suicide without embarrassing his family was to run around the block as fast as he could until he killed himself. After several futile attempts, he found to his surprise that he started to feel better and chose to live.’

Sound silly? It’s not. ‘Ten months of exercise outperformed a leading antidepressant in easing symptoms in young adults diagnosed with depression,’ says James Blumenthal, a professor of medical psychology at Duke University in the USA. His research found that 30 minutes of aerobic exercise three times a week cut depressive symptoms by 50 per cent.

10 Better at sport

It’s logical that exercise should make you better at sport, but how much better? Your maximum oxygen uptake can be improved by up to 20 per cent, according to Per-Olaf Astrand, a man described by other men in white coats as ‘one of the founding fathers of exercise physiology’. Sadly, his research did not discover that your ability to control that crossfield pass on a muddy park pitch will improve by 20 per cent, too.

11 Fight disease

In fact, fitness is a miracle pill, according to the scientists at the Harvard School of Public Health (HSPH). It helps prevent heart disease, strokes, diabetes, obesity and 12 – count ’em, 12 – types of cancer, including the colorectal, pancreatic and prostate types.

‘Exercise is the single thing that comes closest to a magic bullet in terms of its strong and universal benefits,’ says HSPH associate professor Frank Hu. We’re not sure about bullets having strong and universal benefits ourselves, mind, but Hu knows what he’s talking about where fitness is concerned.

12 More attractive

We’re not being body fascists here. Regular exercisers feel more attractive, according to those worn-out University of Arkansas researchers, and males who exercise regularly feel even more attractive than their female counterparts (not that we’re vain or anything).

So if you lose weight and are happier and more confident in yourself as a result, you’ll be more attractive to the opposite sex. With a bit of luck, you may even get to prove to yourself that point 1 isn’t a lie.

13 Richer

Oh, hang on. Unless you are a celebrity personal trainer, this may not actually be true.