A cop pulls over a couple for speeding. He walks up to the driver and says, "I clocked you doing over 80 mph, sir".
"Gee officer," says the driver," I had it on cruise control at 60".
"Don't be silly dear," the wife chimes in. "This car doesn't have cruise control."
As the cop begins to write the ticket, the husband growls to his wife, "Can't you just shut the hell up?"
The wife smiles and says, "You should be happy the radar detector went off when it did."
"A radar detector?" says the officer, "That's illegal!" He starts to write up a second ticket. "Damn it woman," screams the husband, "keep your damn pie hole shut!"
The officer bends down, looks at the woman and asks, "Does he always talk to you like that?" "Oh heavens no," she replies, "only when he's been drinking."