Tim Lovejoy is a proper football fan – a die-hard Chelsea man who’d happily auction off his own kidneys just to get a match ticket. Not that he’d need to, of course – he’s got John Terry on speed dial. With his new job at Radio 5 Live to get excited about, we thought we’d track him down and ask him your big questions. And some about Helen Chamberlain’s breasts!

Is there a Premiership player you consider to be a good friend?
Damien, Northants
I know loads of Premiership players, but do I hang out with any of them? No. I still hang out with my mates – the boys from Soccer AM – and with my old mates who I grew up with. I do like all the footballers, though. It’s quite nice to have the England captain’s number on your phone. He’s a top man.

Why did you leave Soccer AM? I’m gutted.
Tom Meggison, Bury St Edmonds
I’m so fed up with that question! I’d done 11 years, I was out of contract and I’d got some other ideas and other plans for things that I wanted to do. The show was tired and rather than revamp it again, I thought I’d move on and try some different things, like [his new Radio 5 Live show] 606, which is another dream job. Do I miss it? Well, yeah I do. It’s hard to watch. It’s a bit like seeing your girlfriend go off with someone else.

Had any nightmare guests on Soccer AM?
Eric, Cornwall
The only guests we’ve had to get rid of were Carl and Didz from Dirty Pretty Things when they were absolutely trashed. They hadn’t gone to bed and they came on and weren’t making any sense. We had them on for one part then went to the ad break. I went to the toilet and I was laughing my head off thinking, ‘If I was at home watching this I would enjoy it so much.’ There’s nothing better than watching drunk people on TV. But in the next part they swore so we had to say, ‘Look you’ve got to come off now!’ It was a shame.

How could you work week-in, week-out with Helen Chamberlain, who’s such a top bird, and yet never have shagged her?
Uncle John, Swaysey
Who says I’ve never slept with her?

What’s José Mourinho actually like?
Mark, Sheffield
He’s such a top man. I was in a room one time and he came across to me and said, ‘Hi Tim, how are you? We all watch your show at Chelsea. We love it – very good, very funny.’ José’s great as well because he’s not scared of the media. A lot of the managers say, ‘No one can have anything to do with the press – no one talk to them!’ whereas José is so comfortable. He’s like, ‘Yeah do what you want, but if you go to the press and have a pop at me and slag me off, you won’t play!’ – as Ricardo Carvalho found out!

What’s your funniest Soccer AM moment?
Steve, Kidderminster
My favourite moment – and it’s probably the funniest as well – was with Ray Winstone. He’d just been doing Sexy Beast and he had all his hair bleached and combed back. He walked on in flip-flops, a short-sleeved shirt and shorts and I said to him, ‘All right Ray, nice of you to dress up for Soccer AM.’ He just turned to me and said, ‘Shut it Lovejoy!’ I think that was probably the best ever moment of Soccer AM.

What’s been your most embarrassing TV moment?
Smoggers, Highgate
The Chelsea v Arsenal final at the Millennium Stadium in Cardiff [May 2002] when I was doing the commentary with Bradley Walsh. Ray Parlour picked up the ball and I said: ‘Don’t worry, it’s only Ray Parlour,’ but then he spanked it into the top of the net. I got caned for it and I still get caned for it now. They even put a shirt up in the Arsenal club shop that said: ‘It’s only Ray Parlour’!

What do you consider is the most risqué gag you’ve got away with?
Si, Leeds
There was a Soccerette on once, doing power lifting, and I said to her, ‘Can I see your snatch?’ and that was it. I still can’t believe I got away with it, though in all fairness there’s nothing wrong with it because it’s part of power lifting and if you thought it was crude it’s your mind and not my gag!

Have you seen Helen Chamberlain’s tits? Are they any good?
Adam, Inverness
Ha! Yes and yes.

Who’s the best Premier league player?
Bill, Islington
I think Steven Gerrard is the best player in the world at the moment. He has the ability to control a game when he’s playing in the centre of the park. There are a lot of great English players around at the moment: Frank Lampard, Joe Cole, John Terry, Wayne Rooney… but I think at this particular moment in time Stevie Gerrard is the best.

What’s your favourite football moment?
Steve, Jersey
I’ve got to say Robbie Di Matteo’s goal against Middlesbrough. It was brilliant – and such a pleasure watching that cup final after knowing that you’re 1-0 up after 43 seconds. Actually, just on the way into this pub today, Di Matteo pulled up, wound down his window and said, ‘Are you soliciting for business?’ and then laughed at me.

How many of the Soccerettes have you shagged? Come on Tim, be honest…
Jason, Suffolk
Erm… none. Ha ha ha!

Tim Lovejoy presents 606, the UK’s biggest football phone-in and online football community on Radio 5 Live every Wednesday at 10pm. Listen to the show and visit the messgebaord at www.bbc.co.uk/5live